The Secret Knowledge of Grown-ups, the Third File

The secret knowledge of grown ups

Grown-ups always tell me to use manners.

Official reason:

It is polite.

Real reason:

There are 2 small words in your mouth. They are please and thank you.  Each one needs air like humans. If you don’t use them they will get sick. When they get a chance they will jump out of your mouth. When they are out you will never be able to say please or thank you again. The words will jump into another person’s mouth and when the person says please or thank you the person will say it twice. That is why you must use your manners.

Posted by: Karate Master

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Grown-ups always tell me “Do your homework.”  They say it’s because you will get in trouble in school, but I know the real reason why. It’s because if you don’t do your homework, it’ll eat everyone. When you go to sleep, unfinished homework gets out of your backpack and it gets hungry for knowledge. It creeps into your bedroom and eats your brain. In the morning, you feel dumber. It’ll take over your school, your family, friends, your dog, cat, hamster, fish, teacher, house, kids, books, backpacks, paper, desks, computers, and the whole city. The more it eats, the more it grows, so do your homework!

Posted by: Harry Potter fan

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Grown-ups always tell me to put on lotion. They say it’s because your skin won’t be itchy and dry. But I know that it’s really because there are little dots that live right under your skin. If you don’t have lotion, they get bigger. Keeping your body covered in lotion shrinks the dots, and they can’t turn into evil monsters. Don’t forget 10,000 years ago when people didn’t have lotion and their skin fell off; it turned into an evil skin monster. So PUT ON LOTION KIDS, OKAY!!! PLEASE WE BEG YOU!

 Posted by: Popstar

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Grown ups always tell me that I cannot have Santa’s phone number.

They say it is because Santa doesn’t have a phone. But I know that it is really because if every kid calls him then he’ll be too busy talking the phone and he won’t be able to make presents. Also, he will take our phones and then he will feed them to his pet shark, Snappy.

Posted by: Ninjagirl

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Grown- ups always tell me, “Don’t forget your lunchbox.” They say it’s because you will get hungry if it’s not with you. But I know that it’s really because if your stomach doesn’t eat , it will BOOM!!!!! Explode.

That’s the truth ...

Posted by: Incredible Spark

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Grownups always tell me to go to school they say it’s because I will get smarter but

I know it is really because all the teachers who got fired from school turn into monsters. If you don’t go to school they come and eat you!

So that’s why you go to school.

P.S it does not count if you are sick

Posted by: Skateboard dude

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Grownups always tell me to eat at the table. They say it’s because its polite, but I know that IT’S REALLY because if you  drop  the food on the floor it will turn into a food worm. 11,000 years ago people had to eat on the floor. If they dropped food, it turned into a worm. If they dropped more food, it caused the worm to grow.  on the ground and it turned into a food worm if they got food on it.  It grew so large it started to eat people, and then the people figured out they could eat the worms so that’s why if you don’t eat at the table they will come back.  

Posted by: Depsy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~